Safeguarding a child’s mental health is always important, especially when they are a teenager. The problem is that they aren’t as willing to listen and they’re around less. The good news is there are still some effective strategies you can use as parents to support them through some challenging years. 

Explore Herd Dynamics 

In elephant herds, the matriarchs are well known for providing guidance, protection, and social support to younger elephants, fostering a sense of belonging and security within the group. Humans are not elephants, of course, but we can still take steps to create that nurturing bubble for teens. 

At the top of the list, set a goal for having family meals together without any distractions from television or electronic devices. Only one in four adolescents eat a meal with their family every day, but frequent family meals have a protective effect on the mental health of adolescents. This is especially true for girls. If this is not something you do regularly, just start with one night a week and then work up to two or three. Who knows? It might even lead to a game night, or some other unforeseen bonding activity.  

Ultimately, you want to create spaces and find pockets of time to open the doors to better communication. If you are still their Uber driver, this may be during the ride to school. Or the ten minutes before they go to bed when their defenses are down.  

Teens need to feel comfortable expressing themselves without fear of judgment. Listen and validate as you can. These moments may also be a time to reinforce what the boundaries are for behavior. You might learn more about their interests and how to support them, too. However you can, celebrate their individuality and their special place within your family. 

Healthier Habits Happier Homes 

You probably didn’t need statistics to believe it – but a healthy teen is a happier teen. A Stanford study says only 5 percent of U.S. teens get enough sleep and exercise. And teens spend way more than the recommended max of two hours a day in front of screens. 

The recommendation is that teens age 13 to 18 get eight to 10 hours of sleep a night. They should also try to get one hour of physical activity every day.  

Before you attempt to lay down the law, don’t forget to look at yourself. When your kids see you having fun and being active, it sets the tone. The same goes for when they see you getting enough sleep and taking breaks from screens. Leading by example makes the biggest difference in showing them how to keep things balanced. 

Resilience Rocks 

Help your child develop effective coping mechanisms to deal with stress, anxiety, and challenges. For younger teens, try a “Worry Jar” ritual. Your child can jot down worries or anxieties on slips of paper, and then once a week, you both review them.  

Discuss each concern and come up with practical solutions or positive affirmations together. This ritual helps your child externalize their worries, build problem-solving skills, and feel empowered over their emotions. 

Encourage mindfulness for older teens. Studies suggest about 15 minutes of silence can reboot the brain, helping manage stress. Daily mindfulness practices like deep breathing or meditation can be a part of this.   

Reel-to-Real Connections 

It is no surprise that the media is often not a friend to your teen. And it’s harder to limit their time online when they are technologically savvy and not around. 

That said, parents should set screen time limits, monitor content, and establish media-free zones at home.  Angle for some shared screen time where you and your teen watch some reels or other content together. Your perspective might rub off on your child. 

The best way to keep teens offline is to redirect them to some other fun activity. Maybe you can subsidize a movie night out with their friends or see if there’s an out-of-the-house opportunity for them to pursue an interest or hobby. 

Keep Those Social Circles Going 

You can’t schedule their playdates anymore, but it’s still important that they’re building relationships with family, friends, and peers. Research shows that kids with strong social networks feel less stressed and anxious, have fewer bouts of depression, and feel better about themselves. 

If your teen finds this tough, nudge them towards hobbies they enjoy. You may not be able to arrange hangouts with friends, but you can point your teen in the right direction if you see an opportunity. Keep an eye on their online interactions but encourage them too, as it is another way to socialize. 

A Helping Hand to Teens and Parents 

When parents do recognize consistent problems or red flags, outside help can make a difference. At Oaks Counseling Associates, we offer a supportive environment for teens to explore their concerns. Try a 15-minute consultation to see if our services are right for your teen. Taking this step can often make family relationships better for both teens and parents.

This blog was written by Chelsea Koutroulis, M.Ed., LPC-Associate, CST. Koutroulis is supervised by Megan Pollock, MS, LPC-S, CST.